My mom used to tell me when I was younger that if I swallowed my gum my butt cheeks would eventually stick together. While I'm not an avid gum chewer, I'll admit this had me curious. Every once and awhile when I did chew gum, I would swallow it. Later on, before stepping into the shower, I would examine my backside in the mirror to make sure she wasn't actually right. We all know that there is hardly anything more frustrating than when you're wrong and your parents are right.

Of course, I also used to think I was the only person in the world who showered naked. That's what bathing suits were for--I can't really defend this one, it's too ridiculous. But I like the visual, somewhat related to Tobias being a "never nude." Similar principle.

And then there's "the napkin dance." It would be nice to think there are other families who know what I'm talking about. It's not a difficult concept. You put your napkin on top of your head and dance around the table exclaiming, "the napkin dance, everybody doooo the napkin dance." Something tells me this is not what society has in mind when they are trying to reinforce families to sit down together for dinner. But, households should celebrate togetherness in their own ways. I'm finally proud to admit to "the napkin dance" and how it has contributed to my own quirky personality traits. Now that I'm older and 'wiser,' I understand that this performance will only make a comeback after several cocktails.

Now that I've opened the door to embarrassing moments from my life, I should also admit that chewing gum to this day still makes me think what my butt would look like if the cheeks stuck together. I'm going home this weekend, and coincidently, if you see me at a bar dancing with a napkin on my head just know that it is because this might be my last chance to cut loose before my cheeks start to give.

Name of the week: Coon Larew

Guilty Pleasures of the Week: Gossip Girl Season 3, No Reservations Season 1

Album of the week: The Smoking Popes Destination Failure


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